How much will you push your boundaries?

As Murali walked into the house of Siddharth, his wife welcomed him. With a smile she said “He is still sleeping. Not gotten out of bed yet. Poor guy, he had continuously worked for 48 hours online.”

“48 hours?” Murali asked with an element of surprise. “Yes. He did not sleep for two days” she continued: he said he had to finish a project. Every time I talk to him, he says, “Dead-line, Dead-line…I am tired of listening to that word.”

“Did he ever talk to his manager and explain the problem?” Murali continued. “He says that every time I talk to my boss, he says, ‘push yourself a little more, you can do it.”

“Siddharth is no exception” she continued. “Even in the school where I work, many times I go to my principal and tell her “Mam, it is impossible to work for Severn periods continuously. I will crumble. She replies “A few more weeks Vanitha, you can push yourself a little more. I will soon find someone who can offload your work.”

“Push a little more. Push yourself a little more… you can do it. it is an exigency…” All of us have heard such narratives in many places.

Pushing oneself beyond the boundaries is not a normal state of behaviour. It does help sometimes for a set of given purposes but when done without purpose, resources, and adequate support systems, it might drive one to press panic buttons.

There is a considered argument that pushing oneself a little more helps in pumping a little more of dopamine to action. People believe that you do so to bridge the gap between your current level of performance and the achievement levels that either you or an agency has set as the target.

One must consider the following questions before pushing the self to levels beyond definable levels of performance.

What am I pushing myself? Why am I pushing myself? Is pushing the self-needed?

Psychologists do point out that pushing oneself beyond the boundaries often happens when one moves from the current static mindset to a growth mindset. It helps to boost the competency level of the individual to better heights. It helps to tell the self that one is capable of better performance.

But when someone else pushes you to move beyond boundaries, the work often becomes a psychological burden. So, the individual carries a psychological burden which they do not want to. This creates a conscious pain in executing the work. The quality, the passion, the commitment to execute the work decreases considerably. It also results in productivity loss. There is every possibility of the passion or the commitment declining with every step taken forward.

“I am doing this work because the boss wants me to do it. Otherwise, I am not interested.”  Raghu’s statement clearly indicated his level of frustration in doing the same. He was pushing himself to work which he did not like.

“See the profession is a noble profession. It demands a sense of sacrifice. So, if you want to emerge as a great teacher, you must work a little harder and push yourself to…” Mary had heard these words several times. Pushing people to move beyond boundaries at the cost of their competencies, professional requirements and health limitations has profound consequences to the trust and goodwill people carry about the organization. The exodus of good people from organizations is also seen when they find they are pushed to boundaries which they cannot cross or achieve.

“Take it light” said the consultant psychologist to a marketing executive who was dreaming about his numbers when he was asleep. “Sir, there is a huge market competition” he yelled. The doctor smiled and said “when you fall sick, the market will not come to help you nor the company. Achievements you claim, which do not contribute to your personal safety, growth and good life are not real achievements.”

Cases of nervous breakdown, self-defeat, self-pity, and depression have also been reported when people become mute pawns in their working places just delivering the orders given to them. Every job requires some freedom to think, freedom to perform and freedom to demonstrate competencies. Evey job demands space to grow.

Next time, when you have a situation where you want to push yourself a little more, a little beyond the boundaries, ask yourself- for what, for how long and at what cost?

Remember, pushing should not lead to self-destruction. Exhaustion is not always evidence of commitment. Sometimes it is evidence that the boundary has been crossed too far.

Remember, do not push yourself beyond boundaries when your values are at stake- Never confuse ambition with permission to compromise integrity.

Remember, do not push yourself beyond boundaries when the risk is disproportionate to the reward. Courage without judgement can become recklessness.

Remember, do not push yourself beyond boundaries when someone else's boundary is involved. Your desire for growth does not give you the right to violate another person's dignity, autonomy, or consent.